The Question of Chance and the Dilemma of the Truth

Just when you thought all things are certain, you'd still gamble giving chances and try your best to change what is deemed to happen as you have foreseen the truth, you'd be swept by emotions and try not to be yourself just to trick fate. In more of my attempts to establish change and adventure, i have always been put back on track. Been-there-done-that experiences and wisdom which made me more aware is one of my biggest challenges to defy my own generalizations on things. Tried getting away and being detached at work to give more chances for new breed of aspirants but the absence has brought bigger consequences and i am being asked to fix everything again like i used to do before. I don't wanna be the leader, i want to be the consultant to give me more time to do other things. For two years of not being president, the organization has had numerous litigations and sheriff confiscating assets and in as much as i want to be indifferent so as not to "eat" my time for myself, my conscience knowing i can fix it simple fast and with little risks, i am being hunted by my own self to leave it or fix it. Just like relationships, i have seen what was coming but i'd risk and give chances though the end will not be changed, i'd still be Messianic to try being the kindest woman to exist in this world but if i will be hunted by my own emotions, i'd choose to be rational. Whew! The ultimate goal of man indeed is to conquer thyself! I possess no guilt for every actions taken thereof but more of pity for the organization and for the lost soul i've tried to redirect. The dilemma of the truth that gambling on chances will never be mastered. Oh, well, burrow yourself on the thought that since you have not gained guilt and fear in the present, tomorrow is another struggle to abhor love and peace. In bocca al lupo